Look at the stars...

All of a sudden, my stars seem to shine just that little bit brighter.

XSTV

It was one of those dreams. Yes. One of THOSE dreams. One of those which he is never quite sure about. One of those which makes sense but not the way he would like it to. One of those that makes him think about it through the day. One of those which he can't even remember properly. Its essence lodges itself somewhere inside his head. It reminds him of all the things that he really doesn't want to remember. It makes him feel all those emotions that he thought were buried in the past. It is a reflection of all the things he ever wanted to be but only if he was someone else. It's still in his head. Now it's humming a tune that he doesn't know. But then again, he might know it. He is never quite sure of it. It worries him because he cannot quite pin-point that exact memory which creates these shadows in his head. He needs some coffee. He drinks some coffee. He feels better. Light-headed. Now all is quiet. The voices are gone. He is happy.


Writing in third person always gives me that extra sense of security.

Impromptu Jig

Nothing to do.
hoo hoo.
i think i'll go and visit the loo.

Nothing to do..

My return to blog world is, to myself, quite unexpected. I had decided, quite firmly if I may add, that my return to this space would only be after I acquire a faster internet connection. However a sudden urge to write about nothing at all has taken away that resolve. The heat is killing me, not to mention the humidity. I think I have injured my foot beyond repair while playing football today, and my guitar misses a third string. This certainly isn't my best day. I haven't been up to much else. Some antics with my band have kept me amused. A friend of mine has found out that another 75ml of alcohol would have killed him. Another is mostly busy in a clandestine love affair. As you can see most people are busy with something or the other. I also need somthing to do. Don't ask me to paint myself purple and run around polka dotted shorts....tried that already. Ran out of purple paint actually. I need somthing new to do!

I think I'll go to the kitchen and make myself the biggest sandwich ever made...

Superstition

I was travelling in a taxi and all of a sudden the driver stops in the middle of the road. I might have dozed off, so I woke up with a start. Expecting to see a huge queue of cars lined up in front of me I craned my neck out of the window. Interestingly, all I could see was an empty stretch of road with not a soul in sight. That is if you don't count the cat (no reason why you shouldn't count the cat, but then again you may just ignore it). Well, you see, there was this skinny, grey cat which was moving from one side of the road to the other in the most leisurely manner. At the moment the only thing I could help noticing was the meter of the taxi which was creeping upwards in the most alarming manner! After the cat had crossed the road (sitting down to lick its butt twice in the meantime) and disappeared completely behind a fence, the driver closed his eyes and screwed his face as if to remove all traces of memory attached to the cat. After that, he counted what seemed to me to be a billion and brought his hands together and looked towards the heavens. Possibly he prayed for himself, his family, his extended family, his second cousin thrice removed who had her seventeenth kid last Monday and the rest who are in dire needs of a prayer (which pretty much includes the whole of the country). All this time, the meter ticks away.

Now, don't get me wrong here; I have nothing against the superstitious. That is, nothing, if it doesn't cost me anything. But hey! If superstition burns a hole in my pocket, I quite obviously object! So where exactly do we draw the line? I mean as long as my interests are not in conflict with your superstition I have no problems. The public and the private have always been in conflict and so they shall remain long after I am dead and gone. Their seeds are sown so deep in our consciousness that through our entire lives we are only vaguely aware of the countless times we shuttle between the rational and the irrational.

Anyway, I'm basically just pissed off at having to shell out three extra bucks.

Billy Joel And 3

Piano Man by Billy Joel

It's nine o'clock on a Saturday
The regular crowd shuffles in
There's an old man sitting next to me
Making love to his tonic and gin

He says, "Son can you play me a memory
I'm not really sure how it goes
But it's sad and it sweet and I knew it complete
When I wore a younger man's clothes

La la-la di-di daLa-la di-di da, da dum

Sing us a song, you're the piano man
Sing us a song tonight
Well, we're all in the mood for a melody
And you've got us feeling all right

Now John at the bar is a friend of mine
He gets me my drinks for free
And he's a quick with a joke or a light-up-your-smoke
But there's someplace that he'd rather be

He says "Bill, I believe this is killing me"
As the smile ran away from his face"
Well I'm sure that I could be a movie star
If I could get out of this place"

La la-la di-di daLa-la di-di da, da dum

Now Paul is a real estate novelist
Who never had time for a wife
And he's talking with Davey who's still in the Navy
And probably will be for life

And the waitress is practicing politics
As the businessmen slowly get stoned
Yes they're sharing a drink they call loneliness
But it's better than drinking alone

Sing us a song, you're the piano man
Sing us a song tonight
Well, we're all in the mood for a melody
And you've got us feeling all right

It's a pretty good crowd for a Saturday
And the manager gives me a smile
'Cause he knows that it's me they've been coming to see
To forget about life for awhile

And the piano sounds like a carnival
And the microphone smells like a beer
And they sit at the bar and put bread in my jar
And say "Man, what are you doing here"

La la-la di-di daLa-la di-di da, da dum

Sing us a song, you're the piano man
Sing us a song tonight
Well, we're all in the mood for a melody
And you've got us feeling all right



Very hummable tune. Very nice lyrics. A current favourite.

Not much has been happening lately that is worthy of writing. I did play a cricket match yesterday against Philosophy in some kind of vague competition. We lost miserably. I scored 3 and got my off-stump knocked off. After that embarassment I tried my hand or arm at bowling (thankfully it was before the second innings actually started). The ball never quite reached the batsman. It landed somewhere between short fine leg and square leg. After that I quietly removed myself to the fine leg position and stayed there for the rest of the game.
In my defense, I haven't held a bat for about six months and haven't played a proper cricket match in about two years perhaps more. In fact, I didn't even know there was a match. So, in short, I was unprepared. However, these are no excuses if you actually consider their bowling quality. Well, I'll let these pass.
I should be preparing for college 'cause I'm already very late.

Rants Of A Nostalgic Fool

I remember sitting in the verandah, staring at space, sipping coffee and wondering whether I will ever make any friends. This was the day before I joined university. For once those to whom I would normally run with the simplest of problems were not available. I was lonely, I was miserable. It was a time when I was afraid. In fact, I wanted to wish these thoughts away so badly that I watched "Tarzan the Wonder Car". Yes. That was how desperate I was.

I have grown up in a multi-storied building with about six or seven people of roughly the same age as mine. I don't remember how or when we became friends, but I know without them woudn't be the person I am today. These were the people whom I could depend on. I had boundless faith in them, and knew that they would never let me down.

It was a building filled with laughter and energy. We would have some game or the other every day. When it was raining, we would just sit in the shade and talk. We would talk for hours about this, that and everything. Durga Puja would hold a special attraction for us. It was a time when we did not have any studies. It was a time we were free. It was a time to get together and while the day and the night away. What we did during those five days I have very little recollection of but I know that those were the days I would give anything to get back. The building was the centre of our world. It was the place where our friendship grew. It was a place which insulated us from the rest of the big bad world.

Today the building is dead. There are no sounds of laughter. Where's the kid with the football? Where are those that were sitting against the pillars and laughing about some joke which not even remotely funny? Where are those who felt lucky because they belonged? Some of them have gone away to study in other cities or other countries. Some have grown tired waiting for a reply. Some, like me, have tried to break these bonds and move on but failed miserably. These are bonds that we forged and ones that would remain. No. "Tarzan - The Wonder Car" would not help me now.

I am a fool.